Facebook Talk

By far my favorite Facebook Idiot to date!

Name: dan steel
Email: dsteel50@gmail.com
Message: our son notified us from college that someone posted a slanderous facebook using his name and does not know who did it and would like to get it removed. what does he need to do?

Goob: “What does he need to do? Stop being a pussy? The boys in college now! Tell him to stop whining, go chase some hot tail, and quite moaning to mommy and daddy all the time.”

Dan: “I think maybe you’ll be on the evening news tomorrow night and maybe get a call from my attorney. Are you not facebook management?”

a few minutes later, he sent this…

Dan: “Since your so stupid, I hope you have money also. My attorney’s will have a hey day with this. There whole business is eating guys like you for lunch. Your website will be shut down shortly for impersonating facebook help. As I go through your God forsaken site I’m obviously not the only one who fell for your lunacy.”

Goob: “Notice the part on my contact page that says if you need any Facebook help, then you need to contact Facebook? Yeah, that’s pretty cool, especially how it’s bolded to make it stand out against everything else on the page! The numberous posts I’ve made on the front page saying I don’t work for Facebook and the page wide footer bar saying FacebookTalk is in no way associated with Facebook are also quite unclear to people. If by “people” I meant “idiots.”

Also, you attorney’s what is going to have a hey day with this? What do they own that is going to enjoy my e-mails? Their sense of humor? Also, do you mean “their” whole business? You know, on second thought, I’m guessing your kid is as slow as you are. Which means he’s probably at community college, if that. In other words, there probably aren’t any hot girls nearby and I should go ahead and send him my old McDonald’s uniform!

See what I did there? I implied your son will be working at McDonald’s soon. I wasn’t sure if that was clear enough or not. Never can be too sure!

Dan: “My guess is calling yourself GOOB says it all”

Goob: “Oooooh, that was a pretty good zing. I like how you capitalized my nickname just to make it stand out, as if I might not understand the thinly veiled insult. I think you’re about ready to step up the the big-boy leagues and try out a few yo mamma jokes!”

I really wish Mr. Dan Steel would e-mail me back, but alas this Facebook Idiot finally learned not to feed the troll. Call me crazy, but his name sounds a little fake as well. Dan Steel? Really? I’ve seen better fake names on the back of adult videos.